Lost Looks

A recent question on a social media site: What should a man do if the woman he loved got old and lost her looks?

Let's deconstruct this.

First, what does that mean, really, "she lost her looks?" Did her face melt off of her head and sneak away to hide under a bed with dust bunnies or in the attic among antique furniture and cobwebs?

If someone loses their looks, then what exactly do they look like now? A blank slate? A skeleton skin? (Eew.) A punching bag with hair? But what if hair is lost as well?

If someone's looks have been lost, can they be found, like we find lost keys or library cards? If I found these lost looks, who should I report it to? The Lost Looks Lost and Found? The police? Is there a cardboard box, or a file cabinet, or a series of hooks where these lost looks are kept until claimed? And once claimed, what does a person do with them—replace them? Would I be able to tell if someone is wearing their previously lost looks, now re-attached? Would it matter?

Here's the rub: this comment is made about women. Have you ever heard someone bemoan that a man has "lost his looks"? Rarely. Usually men become "distinguished" as their hair turns silver.

This comment about lost looks implies that a woman is no longer young and attractive, but rather is old and ugly, and therefore "lost". Translate = useless.

Truthfully, most of us women who reach this "old and ugly" stage of life, hardly feel lost. We feel found. We've found renewed passion for past talents, freedom from the dictators of make-up and fashion, and security in discovering the delightful, grumpy, honest woman at this far end of life.

All you women out there, take heart. You may one day lose your looks. Men will no longer view you as attractive, sexy, or interesting.

Hallelujah!